ContemplativeJourney

Happy New Year to you! I am anxiously awaiting the kick-off to another long holiday weekend...waiting for the plumber! Seriously...I have some kind of "mainline plumbing stoppage", which means that there is not a functioning bathroom or sink in the house. Fortunately, the world's friendliest plumber, a young man named Chad, is on his way to rescue me from a holiday weekend tragedy. I've decided that plumbers are among the most valuable of service personnel, and am truly grateful for Chad. He was on his way home for a long weekend, and was called back into service in order to rescue me...what a guy! Tomorrow morning I'm leaving for Central Texas, and look forward to spending a long and quiet weekend...enjoying the outdoors, a good book, and a few dozen college football games. I'll be back again next week, and in the meantime, I wish you a very happy and safe new year's celebration.

I've made a commitment to participate in a 1/2 marathon on March 27th, 2011. To be precise, the event is the Rock 'n'Roll Dallas 1/2 Marathon, and we are raising money for the Susan G. Komen Race for the Cure Foundation. You might have noticed that I've made a commitment to participate , rather than to run , and there is a reason for the distinction. I'm using a training system for first-time 1/2 marathoners, and the process requires that you run 1/2 and walk 1/2 of the race...interestingly, the most challenging part of following this system is that I don't feel like I'm doing enough . Do you ever feel that way? Like you're not doing enough? At work, at home...in school...with your friends, for your family? I think it's a common experience, and it can wear you down, if you let it. As I've mentioned before, running has become an enormously helpful metaphor for how I understand life. I said in another blog this morning that my new life philosophy i

Am I the only one who buys stuff for myself while Christmas shopping for others??? No? Good...I didn't think so! I bought a small book during my 'last minute' shopping trip...a devotional of sorts, but specifically for runners . And...as you know...even though I am very, very slow...I am a runner! I wasn't exactly sure what this book of inspiration might contain, and to be honest, I was probably expecting a scripture verse for the day, and then a devotional thought that linked the scripture to running...not so. There is an inspirational quote for each day, but so far, no scripture. I've started at the end of the book, since it works through the calendar year, and we're in the last week of December, but this morning I thought it would be good to read the introduction and the preface...and I found this quote: "For longtime runners, novices...joggers...walkers...it's all the same. If you're enjoying yourself, you're going to do it. Enjoyment fuels

With Christmas come and gone, it's the time of year when many of us ponder resolutions...making plans for changes in the new year. The temptation is often to make a long list of lofty goals...diet, exercise, no more smoking, no more drinking...the options for improving our lives can seem endless. In August of this year, I began using an online tool at sparkpeople.com, and found enormous support and encouragement through this virtual community...support for making small adjustments that would lead me down the path to a healthier life. I've come to believe in the power of small adjustments, rather than big changes that are hard to make, and even harder to maintain. While watching TV last night, I heard an ad for a new movie that opens this weekend...tucked into the snippet of dialogue in the trailer was this quote: "...we are all just one small adjustment away from making our lives work..." I love this quote, and it rings true for me. It reminds me of a discussion I hea

When I started writing these blogs a few weeks ago, I remember asking the question: "What are you waiting for?" Last night, as I sat with a few family members, chatting quietly in the aftermath of a very large Christmas party, I thought again about all of the anticipation of Advent... We had arrived...it was the Night ...O Holy Night...Silent Night... and in a way, I began to feel the icy fingers of disappointment and let-down creep around the edges of my mind. In our common experience of dashing through the traffic (or snow, depending on your location), we have rushed for these last few days to get everything taken care of...to buy the food, wrap the gifts, remember not to forget those things that we always forget...I forgot what they are, but you know what I mean! We forgot the butter...the juice...the gift for Aunt Julie! Suddenly, the clock on holiday preparation runs out...and the frantic pace must give way to stillness... And now...here we are...Christmas Day. What is

"Surely the arm of the Lord is not too short to save, nor his ear too dull to hear..." Thus begins an important prophetic passage in the Old Testament book of Isaiah. The sub-title for the chapter is "Sin, Confession and Redemption." It speaks to the fact that all of mankind are similarly stuck in a state of separation from God. We stumble through life, the blind leading the blind, unable to work ourselves into reconciliation with the God whose blessing we crave and need. At this intersection of God's love and the neediness of man, we find the one thing that separates Christian teaching and belief from all the other religions of the world...after surveying the situation, and the fact that mankind is in such a state of need, Isaiah says this about the Lord's response: "The Lord looked and was displeased that there was no justice. He saw that there was no one, he was appalled that there was no one to intervene, so his own arm worked salvation for him , a

Last night I joined with 3,000 other folks to participate in Dallas' annual Jingle Bell Run. Among the highlights? A man dressed as Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer, including the full body of a reindeer (with legs...and wheels). How he was able to run 3.2 miles with that thing attached to his body, I'll never know...but he absolutely wins the prize for "best costume." Among the runners were Santas and Elves, and people with Christmas tree lights wrapped around them...it was very cool! Way cool! I'll have to work harder on my outfit next year, since my only costume last night was peppermint-striped socks with white fur cuffs, and a jingle bell bracelet. I guess my socks were pretty cool though, because 4 or 5 people stopped to ask me "where did you get those socks??" Note to self: Keep the peppermint socks in 2011, but add Christmas tree lights to complete the outfit (multi-colored, flashing lights would be best). The Gospel reading is from Luke today, and

As I was driving yesterday, I heard the song Unwritten playing on the radio. It's sung by an artist named Natasha Bedingfield, and even though it's been popular for a few years and I've heard it many times, the words grabbed my attention in a new way. Here's a part of the lyrics: I am unwritten, can't read my mind, I'm undefined. I'm just beginning, the pen's in my hand, ending unplanned. Feel the rain on your skin, No one else can feel it for you, Only you can let it in. No one else, no one else, can speak the word on your lips. Drench yourself in words unspoken, Live your life with arms wide open. Today is where your book begins, The rest is still unwritten. Her poetry describes, I believe, precisely why we have the ability...at any given moment, to live a wonderful life! We live forward , not backward...and though our past experiences have brought us to where we stand today, they do not determine what we write as our story for tomorrow. I love the ide

Do you know the movie? George Bailey and his story of self-sacrifice and dutiful service to anyone and everyone that needed something from him? George got caught up in the hum-drum dailiness of his life, and became very sad and depressed about all that he had missed . He was given the chance to see what the world would have been like if he'd never been born...and he learned that he really did have a wonderful life. For the last several days, I've been thinking about an idea for the blog that had to do with running ...as in, jogging...I couldn't quite figure out how to approach the subject, and certainly not how to approach it in a way that would have meaning for all the people in the world who do not run or jog... You might wonder why I've spent so many days trying to figure out a way to write on the topic, given that it's Christmas, and the subject matter of this blog is Advent...but the act of jogging has saved me in many ways, and I wanted to find a way to talk

"The virgin will be with child and will give birth to a son, and they will call him Immanuel -- which means, 'God with us.' I remember a series of TV advertisements recently that focused on the idea of being with someone...we all want to be with , rather than alone. Life is more joyful, less lonely, when we are with someone. By becoming one of us, God has chosen to do life with us. But how is he with us? In yesterday's sermon in church, the pastor talked about how God is with us...he is with us because he has come to live among us...and he is with us because he supernaturally lives within us... and , he is with us because he takes sides with us. He is with us in that way we would say to one another, "Are you with me? " Jesus would say, "Yes, I'm with you! " In Paul's letter to the church located in Rome, there is a wonderful passage that echoes this message: "If God is with us, who can be against us? He who did not spare his own son, b

"For God so loved the world, he gave his one and only son, that whoever believes in him should not die, but have eternal life. God did not send his son into the world to condemn the world, but to save the world through him." This is the message . After we have sorted through all of the debates and disagreements about theology, and how to properly "do church..." whether we baptize by immersion or sprinkling...whether we sing with instruments or without...whether we understand that God saves us entirely through his own work, or whether it is somehow through a combination of his work and our work... the message is a simple one, and it remains the same. This is the message, from the Gospel of John...and it never changes: God loves us, and he gave his one and only son in order to bring us home to him. Can we possibly believe a message so void of complexity? Can we accept the gift, just as it's offered to us? Or will we debate it? Analyze and dissect it? Will we try

When I was a little girl, there were many Christmases when my family would travel to the small towns in northeast Mississippi where both of my parents grew up. This story is meaningful to me because of what happened at the end...when we arrived home, and my Grandmother stood holding the storm door open for us at the top of steps that overlooked the carport...it was indescribable, the feeling I had when we arrived there...and it's a feeling that I believe all of us long for. I can remember as if it was yesterday...the exhilaration I felt as our car circled the last bend and began up the hill to my grandparents' house...the porch light was on, and seeing it in the distance, I could hardly wait for the sound of our car tires hitting the gravel driveway...we were home . The trip was long and tiring, but we were home, and all was hugs and happiness then...the smell of homecooked food wafting from the kitchen...the sounds of laughter and the excited chatter of a joyful reunion... The

I read an Advent devotional yesterday that told a story of kindness... It might be an old idea, a worn out concept, but I felt we should look for an act of kindness that we can offer to someone today...this means that we consciously look for an opportunity to be kind... today. Put it on the "to do" list. Why? A couple of reasons come to mind: 1. Christians are sometimes experienced as less than kind by folks in the world. The Bible has a lot to say about behavior, and holiness, and what we should and shouldn't do...and sometimes, how we are in the world is more reflective of that "should and shouldn't" list, rather than the love that Jesus modeled for us. Jesus said, "Love one another, as I have loved you." What is love? What does it look like in everyday life? There is a famous passage in Paul's first letter to the church at Corinth that provides a definition of love...it is very popular at weddings, but it can also help us with our kindness

I noticed in the daily readings a couple of references to the fact that when we die, we can't take our belongings with us, and the message resonated. In the past few days, and again this morning, my boss has suggested that I consider applying for a higher level position within our organization...the position doesn't matter so much as the lessons that might be learned from the conversation going on in my mind... When someone suggests to me that I might be well-suited for a higher position in the company, I am flattered, of course. The ego boost is not lost on me...at all. On the other hand, I find myself wrestling with questions of real importance...like, "What do I really want in a job?" And perhaps more important still, "What am I willing to give of myself to a job?" The job I have today is an excellent job...and in many respects, for me...an easy job. In recent months I have been intentionally focused on the fact that I am happy in this job... content in

I ate a snowman today...and since I live in Dallas, where the temperature is hovering around 70 degrees, you can probably surmise that this snowman wasn't made of...well, snow . I had the best of intentions when I got up this morning, for eating healthy foods...like the salad I'm now eating for lunch...but somewhere on the way to the salad, a snowman from Krispy Kreme crossed my path, and I ate him. I bring up the ill-fated "Frosty" because he represents, for me, what sometimes happens to my hopes...I hope to do things, I hope things work out a certain way in my life and work and relationships...but hope doesn't always deliver, does it? I was watching the finale episode of "The Biggest Loser" on TV last night, and one of the finalists made this statement: "Without hope, what is there?" It got me thinking about hope, which led to my looking up the word in the dictionary. I love reading the definitions of words, and their background and meaning,

Today's blog will be slightly on the edge, so I'll start with a funny story...I was on a flight from Dallas to Dayton yesterday, and about half-way into the trip, the alarm on a guy's cell phone went off. He was sitting right behind me, so I looked over my shoulder to "check it out..." He was asleep...totally konked out...so the alarm just went off...paused 5 seconds, and went off again...over and over this went on... Finally, I motioned for the flight attendant to come over, and explained that this guy's alarm kept going off...she leaned over, gave him a good shaking, and said very loudly, " Sir!! Your alarm is going off!" I laughed at the irony of having to wake someone up to tell them that their alarm is going off...but perhaps it's only funny to me. With that, I'll retire from a short career as a comedian-blogger...the thing I really want to talk about makes me a little nervous...so perhaps I'm telling the joke to distract from my ne

I've been thinking about happiness lately...where it comes from...how do we get more of it...and what is the relationship between happiness and joy?? Growing up in the church, I was taught that there's a difference between happiness and joy...here's how it went: "Happiness is something that depends on your circumstances, but joy comes from your relationship with God, so no matter what your circumstances, you can be joyful." I can understand the thought, on some level...but to be honest, I don't really see anything in scripture to support the premise, and I'm not so sure that it describes the human experience very well. I bring it up because I'd like to de-spiritualize the whole conversation for a moment, and talk about what it might take for us to live happier...more joyful lives. There's little question in my mind that pleasant circumstances tend to make us happy...what's wrong with that? On the other hand, I have also come to believe that ha

As I read the scripture passages for today's daily office, it occured to me that I should say as little as possible, and use the space to highlight this incredible Psalm...I hope you'll read it slowly, carefully, and with a heart that is open to its message...and meditate today on the character and compassion of the God we serve: Praise the Lord, o my soul; all my inmost being, praise his holy name. Praise the Lord, o my soul, and forget none of his benefits -- Who redeems your life from the pit and crowns you with love and compassion, Who satisfies your desires with good things so that your youth is renewed like the eagle's. The Lord works righteousness and justice for all of the oppressed. The Lord is compassionate and gracious; slow to anger, abounding in love. He does not treat us as our sins deserve, or repay us according to how we've messed up. For as high as the heavens are above the earth, so great is his love for those who honor him; as far as the east is from

In today's gospel reading, Jesus tells Peter that he's going to be tested, but that Jesus has already prayed for him...that he will be restored, once the testing is over. Peter protests this prediction vehemently, and says to Jesus: "Lord, I am ready to go with you to prison and to death." According to the historical record of the gospel, before sunrise of the following morning, Peter had denied even knowing Jesus on three separate occasions, the result of which was great emotional and spiritual torment for Peter...ultimately, as Jesus had prayed, Peter was restored and forgiven, and went on to be a leader in the early church. I have a theory about how we see ourselves...or don't see ourselves. In the gospel story, it's clear that Peter did not see himself as he truly was, and didn't recognize in himself even the capacity to betray the person who was both close friend and spiritual mentor to him. Part of the human condition is a built-in challenge as it re

What if we could wrap a box of love, and put it under the Christmas tree? What would it look like? Would it rattle if you shook it? Would it be heavy or light? I am woefully behind on my Christmas preparations this year...there's no Christmas tree in my front room...no Christmas candles around the house....no presents wrapped, or even waiting to be wrapped! What is wrong with me?? When I was a kid, my Dad sometimes traveled for work, and periodically, my Mom would let me sleep with her while he was away...on those nights, she would tell me stories from her childhood...and one that comes to mind is Christmas. When my Mom was a young girl in the late 1930s and early 1940s, Christmas festivities didn't really begin at all until the week between December 18 and 25. During this week, the general mercantile store would add a toy department, and for just that one week...the kids would ooh and ahh over all the toys in the display window. Christmas trees went up on Christmas Eve, and of

Elizabeth Edwards passed away this week, after a long battle with cancer. I watched a newsclip yesterday...a montage of interviews with her, taken over the past year or two. I cried. I cried because I found her story poignant...sad, and yet not without hope. Part of my sadness was for Elizabeth, and the difficulties she faced in life that I have never faced...part of my sadness was for her family, and her children particularly...but more than these, my heart was saddened by how her journey had shaped her perspective of God. In this interview, she said that the God "she has", had to change. She could no longer have a God who intervenes...though she held on to the idea of a God who saves. Perhaps the perspective is simply indicative of one who has moved beyond their hope for this life, and whose focus has moved to the power of God to save us in the life to come. I don't know...the interview provided a window to her soul of just a few moments...nothing of what it would requi

This might be a hard saying today, and where to begin...? The Old Testament reading is from Isaiah 6, and is a quite well-known passage to those of us who have grown up in the Christian church... "Woe is me, because I am a man of unclean lips, and I live among a people of unclean lips, and my eyes have seen the King, the Lord Almighty!" A modernized translation of Isaiah's lament? "I am a mess, and all the people I live with are a mess, and I'm in no condition to see or be seen by a holy and perfect God." Likewise, I begin this blog with an acknowledgement: I am a mess. I am imperfect, broken, and rarely, if ever, live up to the version of myself that I would like to be. All of the people I live with, work with, go to church with...? They too are a mess...an imperfect, broken mess. They are rarely the people I wish they would be...or that they themselves would hope to be...and yet, here we are...all of us, living in the presence of a holy and perfect God. W

As I read the scriptures for today, I found there wasn't anything that spoke to me...at least not in a way that would allow me to write a blog...I went to sleep in hopes that the morning would bring a new insight, a profound inspiration of some kind...nothing came. This morning I have to take care of some legal issues involving the probate of my Mom's will, and this "errand" reminds me that I have one foot in the Christmas season, and one foot in the camp of the grieving. This is my first time to experience the holidays with the pain of such a loss so fresh on my emotions, but I know that people all around me are experiencing the collision of Christmas joy and personal grief, so it seems important to acknowledge the reality of it. I attended a church service on Sunday evening, a "Hanging of the Green" service where Christmas wreaths are hung, and Christmas carols are played and sung. It was a wonderful evening, and yet I cried through much of it. The songs o

I had the opportunity to work as a volunteer for the White Rock Marathon in Dallas this morning. When we arrived at our "Water Station," they had hung a banner with one of my favorite scripture verses on it: "Run with perserverance the race marked out for you." -Hebrews 12:1 Actually, the poster only included a partial quote of a short passage that I'd like to talk about, so I'll quote the entire thing here: "Since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles, and let us run with perserverance the race marked out for us. Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfector of our faith, who for the joy set before him endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God." -Hebrews 12:1-3 During the sermon in church today, this passage kept rolling around in my mind, and I started thinking about something I heard said on Satu

Do you remember the game "Red light...green light.."? I was thinking about it as I put my thoughts together for today's blog. I heard a speaker talk about red lights at a conference today, and it put this idea in my head about my somewhat checkered history with traffic lights. For some...a yellow light signals the need for caution...to slow down...prepare to stop. For others however, myself included, a yellow light usually means hurry , don't let the red light catch you! Red lights are a burr in my saddle...they slow me down...keep me from where I want to go...they are, in a word: annoying! I have a very dear friend who has listened to me gripe about red lights for more than 25 years...and has patiently endured my lectures on how to get from "Point A" to "Point B" faster, and more efficiently. She laughs at my obsession with saving 10 seconds here, or 20 seconds there...and she is right to laugh...if I was forced to give a full account of why it is

When I was still a child...simple at heart...here are some things I loved to do: I loved 'clackers'. They were glass balls, hanging on a piece of heavy string (mine were purple glass)...and you 'clacked' them together. I don't even know how to explain them to you, but if you know what they are...you know what I mean. My Mom disliked my clackers...alot! They were noisy...and in her opinion, unsafe. I loved to fly kites... my favorite were called "bat kites," and I guess you can probably figure out what they looked like, without a long description. Kites are fun...adults should fly kites more often, I think. I loved to play kickball, football, soccer, baseball, basketball, tennis, ping-pong, billiards (pool), 4-square, tetherball... do you detect a theme? If the game involved an orb (or pigskin)that I could hit, throw, kick or otherwise play with in some manner, I loved it. I still do, and I try to play as often as I can...how about you? Are you still play